How to Gain Confidence and Deal With Problems

Confidence isn’t just for the good times. In fact, the mark of a truly confident person is that they maintain their confidence when times are bad. People who are only confident when things are going well for them have a fragile confidence that you can’t really call true confidence.

So how do truly confident people maintain their self-esteem when things get rough? Well, part of confidence is knowing that you can deal with whatever situation comes your way. In other words, you have the ability to deal with problems. Let’s face it, problems are a part of life. It’s even been said, if you’re not having problems, you’re probably dead.

So it makes sense that we should learn to deal with problems as best we can. But if dealing with problems is a sign of confidence, conversely having confidence can help us deal with problems. It’s kind of a self-powering loop. The better you get at solving problems, the more you confident you feel. The more confident you feel, the better your attitude, and therefore it will be more likely that you will be able to solve problems.

So how do we get better at solving problems? We get practice! We deal with every single small problem we can find and then build our way up to larger and larger problems.

The key to problem solving is keep a solution focus. Don’t get too hung up on the problem. You can spend all day thinking about the problem and make yourself feel worse and worse. Instead focus on the solution. Have faith that you can find a solution.

First of all, define the problem. Write it down on paper if you need to. Then start trying to come up with solutions. Write as many as you can. At least 20. Yes 20! The more the better. Often people find that the 20th is the best solution. Once you have written down as many solutions as you can, pick the best three or four. Apply the solution to your life. If it works, great, you just solved a problem! If it doesn’t try the second, third or fourth options. Repeat until this works.

If you can, also ask the help of someone who has had a similar problem before. Why reinvent the wheel? If they already have found a solution, you can borrow theirs’ and avoid the time taken to discover it yourself.

Once you get good at problem solving, you will feel more and more confident.